Monday, February 4, 2008

The Cosmopolitan Tales


Few weeks before while I was at my cousin's place, I had the opportunity to read Cosmopolitan (I think it is the closest thing I can get here that goes as a substitute for a gay magazine.) Since I know no one would expect a guy to read Cosmo, I was very careful not to get "outed". Every time his wife passed by, I made extra-sure that she wouldn't see me holding the Cosmo. But I had a really fun time reading it. You know how these magazines are, right? Perfect poison for a shallow guy like me with all the peppiness and glamour. In fact I was so hooked on to it that I couldn't stop myself from reading until I reached the last page. Felt like I was eating chocolate ice cream - you just don't want the bowl to get empty.

Since then, I wanted to grab one copy to keep it for myself. Every time I go to the bookstore, I could feel it calling me, "Take me home, allow me to satisfy you.." But what would the people think if they see me buying Cosmo. I don't pass off as a married man so that I'm buying it for my wife. I don't think any brother would care to buy Cosmo for his sister. And don't even take the possibility of a guy buying Cosmo for his girlfriend!

When I told Phoebe about Cosmo, she stated that even a fair number of the so-called macho straight guys would sneakily check out Cosmo. Yesterday while we were shopping for her mother, I saw the magazine and asked her to buy it for me, which she readily agreed. After unloading everything in her home, on our way to railway station we discussed about my dating situation.

Celebrities Naked Centerfold - Cosmopolitan June 2006

I was kinda talking to a guy over the phone for the past one week and the weird part is every time we decide to meet, he would not turn up and later call me and give me some excuse. At first I thought it was just bad circumstances, but when it started to happen every day I began to feel suspicious. Phoebe said she is surprised that I even let that guy to make me fall for something like that, may be because he was that charming. (Imagine.. 7 days, 7 different excuses!) But he would then call me in the night, and sweet-talk to me and make me agree to come for the meet next day. (Yeah so stupid of me, I know!) Phoebe and I wonder what his actual deal is. If he wants to ignore me, then why would he call me later and take the pain of cooling down my frustration. Anyways, this guy and I were to meet yesterday too and I had warned him if he couldn't make it this time also, then that's the end of us. As expected, he didn't turn up and so later when he tried to call me, I just switched off the phone. No more talking to him and letting myself get manipulated this way.

Phoebe prefers me having an African-American as boyfriend. According to her, Caucasians are so quick to fall for commitments, but they are even more quick for breaking-up where as African-Americans take their time to be in relationships and are more serious about being committed. I don't know how much of that is true, what is your opinion? Anyways, I prefer an Indian. But since I am brainwashed by the pictures of sexy hunks that are floating on the internet and most of them are Caucasians, I fantasize about them too. (In fact, I always get a vibe that my sweet prince is waiting for me in Sydney. =p)

Well.. after seeing her off, I accidentally bumped in to my college mates.. yeah with the COSMO!! Thankfully, it was in a cover and I managed to play cool and didn't let it come under their notice. I also managed to sneak the Cosmo in to my room without my parents' knowledge. Right now, it is hiding in my bedroom as though it's a porn magazine!

Now fess up! How many of you guys out there have read Cosmo!

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  • D-Man February 5, 2008 at 11:47 PM

    Ah, you didn't mention the best part of Cosmo: the true confessions! A guilty pleasure of mine!

  • guysome007 October 4, 2008 at 2:29 PM

    well seriously Sam ..Cosmo does the same to me...the first COSMO i read ws around 7-8 yrs back vich i found at my home (dont know whr it came frm)but i used to read it every other day..same stuff again n again...thouhg i nvr bought one but wenever i get a chance it do read it at clinics, somebodys home etc..(hiding frm others as well tht they dont c me reading)

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